called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Still dying that you shit outside
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
