I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
