She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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