Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
