He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
