So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize