This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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