Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
MIDGETS
????
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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