dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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