Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Duck Duck Cougar?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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