i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
