Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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