Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
