Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
