Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
