:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
