"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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