Acid is not a monday night drug
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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