D3 body, D1 cock
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
