Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
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