READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
