You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
