Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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