Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
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