I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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