I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
