physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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