so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
