The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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