thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
