She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize