she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Randomize
