everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
