He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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