So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
