question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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