sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
