He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
