Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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