dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
