On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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