If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
