why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
