Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Can vaginas get frostbite?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Randomize
