This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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