I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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