Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize