Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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