he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Randomize
