I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize