I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
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