So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Randomize
