Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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